Breaking Traditions
By:Jessie Reid

Breaking Traditions: Thinking Beyond 'Bride and Groom'

The wedding industry is very bride-focused: Forms and contracts refer to the "bride and groom," vendors say "bridal party," people sit on either the "bride's side" or "groom's side." And most traditional "bridal" magazines portray the norm as one woman and one man. You decide how to break those traditions.

The wedding industry is very bride-focused: Forms and contracts refer to the "bride and groom," vendors say "bridal party," people sit on either the "bride's side" or "groom's side." And most traditional "bridal" magazines portray the norm as one woman and one man. You decide how to break those traditions. Your vendors and friends/family will (read ‘should’) refer to your wishes on how to be addressed and should be sensitive and considerate enough to ask. And while etiquette, at the very least, determines that it is proper to ask the couple - the couple must also be tasked with the decision of how they’d like to be addressed. And also the patience to spread the word via potential awkward conversations. Etiquette overall can sometimes seem like a straitjacket (“do this, not that”), but it sets out protocol, that simply allows for fewer faux pas.

Furthermore, same-sex couples can offer a way for everyone to rethink title traditions and gender roles -- men do this and women do that. In some ways, you offer an opportunity to reexamine the way a relationship can work and also challenge people's assumptions simple based on how you would like to be referred.

Every indelicate conversation about same-sex titles is important. This is very much on people's minds as this country becomes more familiar and comfortable with same-sex marriage, and as your loved ones embrace you two. And the best part is - it’s up to you!